Announcement: The Central Afro-Icelandic Protectorate of Portugal
Office of the President
— for the —
Central Afro-Icelandic Protectorate of Mali Portugal
OFFICIAL STATEMENT
Reykjavík-sur-Ubangi—The Wheel of Fortunate Nations was spun again this Saturday, a little before four in the afternoon, in Place de la République. The attentive reader will note that Friday was the appointed day. Friday was a busy day. The Wheel keeps the schedule the Wheel wishes to keep.
But this extra day gave us reprieve to big an even bigger wheel. We have collected all our receipts, and the wedges stood as follows:
https://app.warera.io/country/6873d0ea1758b40e712b5f4c 82 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6873d0ea1758b40e712b5f3a 38 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6873d0ea1758b40e712b5ee9 38 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/683ddd2c24b5a2e114af15c5 37 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7aa 34 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/683ddd2c24b5a2e114af15db 31 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/683ddd2c24b5a2e114af15fa 18 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7a0 13 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7a4 12 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7f2 8 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d546e731854c7ac81d 7 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/683ddd2c24b5a2e114af15c1 7 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d546e731854c7ac893 6 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7eb 6 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6873d0ea1758b40e712b5f31 6 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d546e731854c7ac87d 5 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7fe 5 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7b2 5 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/683ddd2c24b5a2e114af1612 4 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/683ddd2c24b5a2e114af15d9 3 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac79a 3 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/696a81da63e2489f47e5a28a 3 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7fb 3 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d546e731854c7ac842 2 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7ac 2 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7b0 2 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d546e731854c7ac880 2 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6873d0ea1758b40e712b5eeb 2 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7be 2 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/687eab339142f76907295e4e 2 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6873d0ea1758b40e712b5ef5 2 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/683ddd2c24b5a2e114af15c9 2 wedges
https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7a8 1 wedge
https://app.warera.io/country/6873d0ea1758b40e712b5ef3 1 wedge
https://app.warera.io/country/6873d0ea1758b40e712b5f2e 1 wedge (fixed)https://app.warera.io/user/697b55e4bcecf3b37667e0d1 10 bribes
https://app.warera.io/user/6820e463d7b95c3c75c20727 10 bribes
https://app.warera.io/user/6914d6b1efb957cfdf0365e8 8 bribes
https://app.warera.io/user/6968cbca54773abe55981d67 7 bribes
https://app.warera.io/user/6a08c4cd00808544f7993111 6 bribes
And today, the Wheel of Fortunate Nations has selected https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7aa.
This caused some panic in the crow that attended out public wheel spin. Some African delegates even fainted and had to be rushed off to chew on some medicinal leaves in the shade. But the Wheel does not concern themselves with the fate of mere mortals, nor with the wars of the world. The Wheels is Fate itself.
And https://app.warera.io/country/6813b6d446e731854c7ac7aa has stood upon the rim every week since the system began. We watched a nation return, week after week, donating generously, and we said nothing, because to comment would have been to question the wisdom of the Wheel.
Much of this was the work of one man. https://app.warera.io/user/6a08c4cd00808544f7993111 one of our most devoted patrons, has subscribed to this newspaper with a discipline I can only describe as institutional. He did not bribe me once and expect a nation. He bribed steadily, week upon week, adding to his position while lesser men declared the arrangement rigged and withdrew. He did not doubt the Wheel, but his own faith.
Today his faith has been rewarded.
Meanwhile, our top man, https://app.warera.io/user/6968cbca54773abe55981d67, is still on top of getting the flag business in order, so that we can adopt our new temporary flag.
The New Central African Flag (Mirror)
Previous: https://app.warera.io/article/6a89d557a955593aec509201
I reiterate for our critics, or future auditors, that the Wheel does not select proxies. This Republic will serve as a Protectorate of Portugal for one Sunday. My legal counsel has advised me that the distinction is paramount, and that I should say nothing further, which I intend to honour to the letter.
To our critics, or future auditors, that the Wheel does not select proxies. This Republic will serve as a Protectorate of Portugal for one Sunday. Even the Security Council was recently forced to admit that they lack any legal standing to question or audit this arrangement.
To Portugal, our warmest regards, and our congratulations on an outcome its persistence had made, over time, a mathematical inevitability.
To https://app.warera.io/user/6a08c4cd00808544f7993111personally, our respect. We look forward to accommodating him in one of our luxury suites that look over Place de la République.
To the nations who bid and lost, our sincere condolences, and a reminder that the Wheel has no memory of who deserved it, that positions may be reopened next Friday, in quantity, and that Portugal is proof the strategy works, in due time.
By the hand of Colonel Muammar Marius Rogér al-Fortier,
President of the Central Afro-Icelandic Protectorate of Portugal
https://app.warera.io/article/6a596755e16a6003153adae1
https://app.warera.io/article/6a5e2cabdcf0f06ddaebc63c
https://app.warera.io/article/6a637f86f972e7c8eba76d50
https://app.warera.io/article/6a6bd514100be268da3fe09c
https://app.warera.io/article/6a75d640f069e8a40fb213d2
https://app.warera.io/article/6a89d557a955593aec509201