ATTENTION BELGIUM & NETHERLANDS: YOUR SUPPORT IS ABOUT TO DROP

A formal notice from the Swedish-German Alliance

For too long, Belgium and the Netherlands have been propped up. Supported. Held in place by the comfortable padding of a quiet map and absent threats.

Those days are over.

Sweden has awakened. Germany has experienced a baby boom of biblical proportions. Yes, our soldiers are young. Yes, they are still growing. But here's the thing about babies:

They grow up.

And when they do, they get hungry. They get angry. And they start asking questions like: "Why does Belgium still exist?" and "What even IS a Netherlands?"

Consider this article the hands reaching around your back. The clasp is already undone. You just don't know it yet.

🩱 click 🩱

Soon, the support you've relied on will fall away. Your territories will be exposed to the cold, harsh winds of Nordic-Germanic efficiency. There will be no padding. No underwire of diplomacy. Just gravity, and the inevitable sag of defeat.

To our friends in Belgium and the Netherlands:

You can surrender now and maintain some dignity. Or you can wait, and watch as a horde of freshly-leveled German teenagers and sleep-deprived Swedes march westward with the unstoppable energy of a man who just discovered his ex moved on.

The bra is coming off.

And nobody is looking away.

This message was brought to you by the Swedish-German Baby Boom Coalition.

Donations are welcome.