JDB For Congress
Mes chers citoyeins, my fellow believers in the true Belgicaanish dream! It is I, https://app.warera.io/user/696e314a9fcc1dc99ed414a6, your favorite ADHD+’O-Holic moderator, investigative journalist, and the only politician in WarEra who promises absolutely nothing and still manages to under-deliver.
A new month is upon us, which means it is time for the democratic circus known as the congress elections. Last month, you magnificent beauties elected me due to sheer political exploitation... And by that, I mean I literally bought your votes with cold, hard kluiten gems and premiums. And what did I do with that power? Rien de knots. I promised to bring absolutely nothing to the table, and as a man of my word, that table remains completely empty. Pas de quoi!
You cannot evaluate my performance because there are literally no statistics (wink to a gorgeous Empress), so you will just have to trust my beautiful, bearded face. Just look at my stellar record from last term:
Self Proclaimed Life of the Party: I brought the ambulance to every single important chat.
Drama King: The moment the zever hits the fan and drama starts, I am always the first one to start yelling, making noise, and waving my Pikrofoon in people's faces!
The 'Unbiased' Vote: Whenever the government needed a completely blind, unquestioning vote, I was there to click the button. Simpel.
The Bridge Builder: I bridged the gap between angry dissidents and our glorious Belgium.
Modest Opinions: I generously interjected my completely honest and incredibly modest opinion on absolutely every topic, whether you asked for it or not.
Running TLN, doing moderation work, and interfering in Congress at the same time is a heavy sjakos to carry, but it is what thrives me! I love this country, I love this community, and I love this game. And let's be honest: only the smart people who vote for me can say the same. The rest are just bleiters.
So, allez, do your patriotic duty. Vote for https://app.warera.io/user/696e314a9fcc1dc99ed414a6! The only candidate who guarantees that the government will remain completely confused.
Gros bisoux, and see you at the voting booths!