Portuguese Secret Order

In June of the year 2026, Portugal fell in three days.

No one understood how. One week the country was arguing about Portugal's performance against Congo in the World Cup, the next, mysterious Belgian expeditionary forces landed along the coast, armed with waffle-powered drones.

Lisbon and Alentejo surrendered. Algarve resisted. Central Portugal, the North, the Azores and Madeira vanished from all maps for reasons nobody could explain.

But Belgium had made one mistake.

They believed the legends were just folklore.

Hidden beneath vineyards, fishing villages, mountain monasteries, and neighborhood cafés existed an ancient order known only as The Irmandade do Chouriço ("Brotherhood of Chouriço").

For centuries they had lived among ordinary people. The old baker in Bragança. The retired fisherman in Nazaré. The grandmother who always seemed suspiciously athletic. None appeared dangerous.

All were ninjas.

Their sacred weapon was the Chouriço Nunchaku two perfectly cured sausages linked by forged steel. Flexible, durable, and surprisingly effective in close combat. According to legend, the secret recipe had been guarded since the age of exploration.

When the invasion began, coded messages spread across the country.

"The grill is lit."

Thousands answered.

By night, black-clad figures emerged from hidden tunnels beneath castles and abandoned tile factories. Belgian supply convoys found their tires mysteriously sliced. Military radios picked up strange fado music moments before entire patrols disappeared.

To this day, the Portuguese government officially denies the existence of the brotherhood.

We can only hope that they continue to operate in silence in order for Portugal to regain it's territories.