My fellow citizens,
The election has concluded.
The votes have been counted.
And, somehow, against all reasonable expectation, I have won.
Again.
I want to be absolutely clear about something.
This is your fault.
I gave you an opportunity.
A clean, democratic opportunity to release me from this office.
You looked at that opportunity.
You considered it.
And then, collectively, you said:
“No. Put him back.”
Unbelievable.
I had plans.
I was going to rest.
I was going to ignore diplomatic incidents.
I was going to watch arguments unfold and think, “That sounds like a government problem.”
But no.
You people had other ideas.
So here we are.
Another term.
More meetings.
More messages.
More situations.
More people saying “quick question” before introducing something that will consume the next three hours of my life.
I hope you're happy.
Because this administration begins today entirely because you refused to let me leave.
Any complaints regarding the government over the coming term should therefore be directed to yourselves.
You voted for this.
You caused this.
You must now live with the consequences.
I will, of course, continue to serve the United Kingdom with dedication, responsibility, and the quiet resentment of a man who could have been free.
Thank you for your confidence.
I suppose.
God save the United Kingdom.
Because apparently I'm still expected to.
The Path continues.