TRAGÉDIA! / TRAGEDY! (artigo bilingue / bilingual article)

O pombo Tobias, que estava encarregue da entrega da caixa de minis que ontem foi a leilão, faleceu. Depois de ter apanhado a sua amada no ninho a fazer um menáge à trois com 1 pardal e 1 guaxinim, o Tobias sacou do seu abre cápsulas e bebeu as minis todas, acabando por morrer vítima de envenenamento por álcool. Por favor rezem pela sua alma e contribuam para as despesas funerárias.

Tobias the pigeon, whose job was to deliver the beer box that was auctioned yesterday, has passed away. After coming home to find his beloved in a threesome with a sparrow and a racoon, he reached for his bottle opener and drank the entire supply of beer, ending up dying from alcohol poisoning. Please say a prayer for his soul and leave a tip to help with the funeral expenses.