Danas su mi doveli igrača koji je rekao da ga boli vrat od 17 sati gledanja marketa i borbi.
Pogledao sam ga odmah i rekao:
“Nije tebi problem vrat. Tebi je duša otišla ukrivo.”
Nije razumio.
Nikad ne razumiju odmah.
Legao je na stol sav ukočen kao da ga vojska transportira. Kaže da mu trnu ruke kad izgubi gold i da čuje Discord notifikacije čak i dok spava. Teški slučaj.
Napravio sam centriranje.
Prvo vrat.
Onda leđa.
Onda monitor.
Čovjek se ustao i pitao me koliko je dužan.
Rekao sam mu:
“Ako sutra opet uletiš u borbu bez metaka, hrane i pola ekipe, ništa nisam napravio.”
Na izlazu me pitao jesam li stvarno doktor.
Rekao sam mu da pravi doktori liječe tijelo.
Ja liječim katastrofe.
—
Today they brought me a player who said his neck hurt from 17 hours of watching the market and fighting.
I took one look at him and said:
“Your neck isn’t the problem. Your soul is crooked.”
He didn’t understand.
They never understand right away.
He lay down on the table stiff as if the army was transporting him. Said his hands go numb whenever he loses gold, and that he hears Discord notifications even in his sleep. Serious case.
I did the alignment.
First the neck.
Then the back.
Then the monitor.
The guy stood up and asked how much he owed me.
I told him:
“If tomorrow you charge into a fight again without ammo, food, and half your squad missing, then I’ve done nothing.”
On his way out he asked me if I was really a doctor.
I told him real doctors treat the body.
I treat disasters.